Saturday, May 2, 2009

Have I crossed the line?

Are Facebook Friends supposed to turn back into Real Life Friends? (I feel like Carrie Bradshaw as I type this.)

I recently reconnected with Jeff. Jeff and I met on vacation when he was 15 and I was 16. We were never anything more than friends and, because he lived a few hours from where I went to college and I adored his parents, we hung out a lot. Then Jeff went to UCLA and sometime after that we lost touch.

As it turns out, we're both Facebook friends with my cousin Marla. By email he mentioned that he, his wife and son always spend 4 July in St. Helena and before I knew it I suggested we all get together when they're here this summer. The next email from Jeff said, "Let's talk about this. What's your phone number?"

Uh oh. Did I go too far? Was I wrong to assume we'd just resume our friendship, spouses and kids now part of the mix? I'm genuinely happy he married a great gal and that they have a child together. I look forward to getting to know her (even though she is a marathoner and is probably skinny) and to introducing him to Dave and The Pinks.

Jeff and I spoke a few days later. He sounds exactly the same and we picked up right where we left off. I can't wait to see him, and meet his family. Apparently I did not cross the line. But this did cause me to pause and reflect.

I have 200+ friends on Facebook. This is very strange to me because I'm not very social. But because I have consulted to many companies and lived in many places I seem to have a lot of Facebook friends. What was it about Jeff that made me sure we could be IRL friends again, even though we live 2000 miles apart? Is it a secret wish for one of The Pinks to marry his son so her in-laws are a known commodity? Is it because I have so few straight male friends because close male friendships are taboo once you're married? (This is another post for sure.) Is it because special friendships are so hard to cultivate when you juggle a family and career?

Food for thought.

1 comment:

Polka Dot Moon said...

Hmmmmm.......interesting question.

I do not have a facebook account, but hubby does and I have to sometimes giggle at the "ladies" out there! And what they put "out there"!! Funny too, that I can log in to his account and read all this ;)


(Chris and I think you're hysterical!)